Arthur Carl Hope

My grandfather passed away two weeks ago and so my family drove to Utah for his funeral. I love my Grandpa, but I never felt like I really took the time to get to know him. He didn't like little kids and my mom tells me he was a grumpy person. I also have lots of family in Utah including my newest Nephew, Peter. So this was not a singularly sad occasion, I looked forward to family and his eulogy just so I could hear more about his life.
Aurthur Carl Hope served in the Military, served a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter -day saints and was the first in his family to ever go to college. He became a mathematician and worked at White Sands Missile Range in New Mexico. I joked that he worked on the Manhattan Project and that was why he was so reserved and grumpy. He was a great wood carver and has some of his artwork on display in a museum. And his obituary states that he loved dogs. He'd had four that I knew of.
The real measure of my grandfather is his legacy. And my real excitement for this trip was my Aunts and Uncles, and cousins. He had five children and 37 grandchildren. I have an Aunt and Uncle who served a mission in Mongolia, and one set who served in Singapore. I have an Uncle who wrote a book called 'Ground Pounders' (good read!) . My cousins are spread from the East Coast to the West and we don't see each other often, but we all get along and my cousins are fun, interesting, down to Earth and down right hilarious. Half seem to be Engineers- part of Grandpa's Legacy, maybe? We hadn't seen each other together in almost twenty years and still were genuinely happy to be together and feel a connection. After the luncheon, each of us stood up and took turns telling a memory. I heard bits and pieces of my grandpa in the memories we had all collected from him and was able to feel like I knew him better. What a good man, what a great family.
We are the ripples of his life that continue on and get greater and greater as we go.

your Challange

If you are reading this and have not yet been married, skip it and go to the next blog.

When I lived in New York, I meet a great gal named Liz Fuller. During one of our girls night chats, she told me of a challenge to make love with your husband everyday for a month. I wanted to try it, but then the laundry, kids, fatigue, head aches, jerky husband...
Then my husband joined the Police Force and the choice was no longer mine to decide. He worked some nights, slept days and the vicious cycle never ended. Poor pitiful me! Have you ever seen LadyHawk? She's a hawk by day and human at night. He's human by day and a wolf by night. Somehow they never connect. (In the above picture I can imagine him wondering if the hawk would try to scratch his eyes out if he tried to kiss her.) Great love story.
A couple of weeks ago my husband informed me he had training for a week and would be off work around 6 every night that week. Somehow (and that's a big somehow) I remembered Liz's challenge. Could I do it? With now 4 kids, a dog and so much going on, would it even be possible. Would I be up to the challenge? How could I pass it up, I had just been told I got my husband back, for a week at least. So last week while he trained by day, I schemed for the night.
Do you want to hear a secret? It was fabulous! A few 'quickies' mixed in and by the end of the week, I was flexing muscles I didn't know I had- Sex muscles! The amazing part was near the end of the week when I didn't feel quite as stresses about things and he seemed more attentive to my needs! We were connecting again. If you are a fan of sex like I am, you've probably read about all the healthy perks of a healthy sex life. I believe its true and more. It creates a healthy marriage and vies versa.
It was a great week.
(Thanks Liz. Hope you get your husband back too! And Liz, and Joy and all of us wives who have to live with out our husbands at times.)

oh, the potential

I secretly lament my own untapped potential. I have often thought, "If I'd just had more time, I could have done that better." Or " If I had all the money to put into that, I could have really created something amazing with that project." I feel that I want to explain myself when I give a gift or a meal, "This isn't how I envisioned it, if you could see the real me...
... but then I think about my neighbor Alfredo Cruz, and people like him. My neighbor is from Mexico and owned a ranch down there before coming up here (why would he leave that?). He worked on concrete until things slowed down and now I hear he works in a restaurant to make ends meet.
I often drive by men standing out on the street corner waiting for work of any kind. With out the hour long debate of who deserves what, politics, and immigration, I think of these men who just want to work and the lost potential of all those man hours. How would it feel to be able and willing and come home at the end of the day with nothing to show from your life. A good job gives that feeling of purpose and success in life- no doubt about it. I wonder if one of these people could discover cancer if they'd been given the change to even dream about college. What potential do some people live with and never achieve. Will we arrive in the next life with a a basket full of would've, should've, could'ves? (I love the Olympics because of the stories of potential achieved!)
I came across this quote from President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Thomas S.Monson and loved it.
"In the private sanctuary of one's own conscience lies that spirit, that determination to cast off the old person and to measure up to the stature of true potential."
I try to look at people and imagine their potential. I saw a women trying to shift decaying fence boards to repair her fence and wondered what she would be like if she were the Queen of England. Imagine the Queen in 'her go-to-corination crown' fixing a fence!
As for Alfredo, when our 'chicken' turned out to be a rooster and had to be 'disposed of', he came and did the deed and then showed me how to de-feather it. He was so remorseful when his dog bit my son, and is a very watchful parent of his own children. If his potential is nothing more than to be a great neighbor,father, husband, then I'm happy for him.
As for me, I'm not done yet.

Airing dirty laundry

Our dryer is out. And my wonderful, overly busy husband will fix it... Until then, we have been hanging everything out to dry. This is a frugal way to save; cloths last longer, are brighter and the energy expense is smaller without that large appliance.
But I have also noticed everything being washed, and so the Laundry Flow Analysis began! Somewhat more intense than an audit from the IRS, I dissected every family members laundry use. It sounded something like this:
"Boys, I have noticed that you each wear a pair of socks 6 days a week. That would result to 12 pairs, or 24 socks a week, but I haven't washed any of your socks yet. It makes me wonder, where are you spending your socks?"
"Hailey, you have worn 5 outfits before lunch on Tuesday and 3 on Wednesday. You have an outfit spending problem and you need to cut back before you become bankrupt!"
"Mackay, I see room for growth in your laundry. Bigger cloths are much easier to hang out to dry after all."
"Chris, I have washed nine kinds of blacks and navy blues. You need to diversify your laundry and I have set forth a portfolio of ideas I'd like to see you in. Please see the tab labeled button down, cotton shirts."
"Jenny, your biggest laundry problems result in stains from others. You can build a nest egg of cloths as a cushion against messy times-or just wear a smock around your kids."
"Jango, because we can not wash fast enough to keep up with you, you must become house trained immediately."
With these easy ideas, your family will cut down in laundry waste, build your portfolio and come out looking good!
With our eyes open to just how much dirty laundry our family of 7 makes, we are polishing our best clothes and NOT buying anything more for Easter. We have enough of everything and really, will be happy to just have clean, pressed clothes for Sunday. Look for us wearing our "normal best" on Sunday and a little more $ in our savings account.

Side note: I do long for the day when I can step out of the shower and dry off with a soft towel that wasn't standing stiff in the corner.

the little things

I found this little lady in my yard. When I first saw her, I thought she was a button. I'd never seen a lady bug so big and red, she didn't seem real. But she clamored over blades of grass on her way to some garden party for which she was dressed up. I was happy to meet her acquaintance even if it meant that I had been pulling wretched weeds from my yard at the time. She didn't seem to mind the weeds and at the moment, neither did I. My kids still have fun in their private yard so they must agree with the lady bug. Maybe I will forget the weeds and take care of the little ones in my life. Enjoy your garden party Lady, and I'll enjoy mine.

It doesn't add up

While waiting for my sons to finish their Karate class, I shared this treat with my daughter Hailey and son, Mackay. I don't usually look at the nutrition facts on things that I eat, it's a waste of calories but since we had time...
We had bought a snack pack with three cookies in it. Don't you love the clouds on the box, "oh look these float on clouds, they must be light"! It declares the serving size is just one cookie- yeah right!- and gives the information for that one serving. But it also gives the info for three which we all know is what I'd really be eating if I wasn't with my children. The information as follows:
Calories for 1: 120 for 3:370
Fat 1: 50 3:160
Sodium 1: 5% 3: 16%
Fiber 1: 6% 3 17%
Now help me out here my mathematician friends, Marily and Julie, how does 50 g of fat for one change into 160 for 3? Is this why they warn us about high fructose corn syrup? Its increasing exponentially. Wow, I thought I lacked in Math. Or could it be the sodium alginate, tricalcium phosphate or sodium acid pyrophosphate. This is why I don't read labels!
Because of this experience, I now buy several packages of chocolate chips at the store. If I'm going to have a treat, and I am, I'm making it my self. My cookies are as good as veggies when compared to these treats and I have several cookies that taste just as good with whole wheat in them. Any one have a receipe for homemade oreos?