See no English, Hear no English, Speak no English!

I was recently invited to my dear neighbors surprise baby shower. My neighbor Veronica is having a girl. She thought she was through and then this little surprise so I'm very excited for her and willing to help out in any way she needs me. Now if only I spoke Spanish. She doesn't speak English and the shower was at a Hispanic friends house. Only white girl-raise your hand. I tried to fit in and say what little I could. I smiled when they laughed and probably looked like an idiot. I had intended to just drop by with a gift, and then go but a Hispanic shower is a little different. Every woman's whole family came, husbands, children, grandfathers etc. And everyone was dressed to the nines, with lots of jewlery and cleavage. (Shot, I'd left mine at home). The food was amazing so I had to stay for that and then fun shower games. I won one- you must pick up cloths pins in one hand with out dropping them and then say one thing a baby needs and try to get the most. Hum, in Spanish? Leche, Leche ...and Mamma and Papa! They said (through a Teenage daughters translation) that was the first time any one had ever said Mom and Dad. Is that enough to redeem myself? Not after the next game.
"Come up" they motioned and then blindfolded me. Next they put a jar in my hand. Baby food? Stop me if you played this game. Really, stop Me! Am I suposed to eat it? No, teenage translator says. You feed your partner. Some one I can't see and can't understand!
So stop for a moment and imagine the picture. I had to enjoy the humor at this moment and then... we're off! I did my best to feel where I was feeding and be swift in the process. When the spoon clanked at the bottom of the jar, cheering! I undid my blindfold and looked up. My partner had babyfood all over her face and down her white blouse and in her in blouse! Oh My!
!Lo siento! was all I could say.
Lots of fun, next time I'll bring my family!

what a thriller

No, I do not think I can dance. But when the teacher of my jazzercize class suggested we do this for our Church's Halloween carnival, how could I say no! Really, the chance to learn Thriller! I'm not sure what got into me, (Halloween possesion?) and I think I was a step behind the whole way but I am sure that I had a blast! Kinked neck and all! It was a pitifully small group of us that performed it (darn toe, Kristy!) but we danced with the funk of forty thousand years and loved it, every minute. (I may not be able to dance, but I can sew-do you like the dress I made for the dance?)

Oh, the Secret Garden!

I had a great time as Costume Director ... and now I'm glad to be finished. 33 children were in this production, and most of them had several changes.
I sewed, planned, shopped, and coordinated to get all the costumes finished by Opening Night, October 20th.
I planned and shopped during the day when I could and then sewed after I put the kids to bed at night. I've seen a lot of late night M*A*S*H, The Office, and listened to a book on tape to help the time go. Here is a before and after of one of the dresses. I bought it at the thrift store and then modified it for the play.
Chris was very good about the mess in my work area, a.k.a our bedroom. As long as he could find the bed at night, he was OK. But there were a few times it was so covered in lace, fabric and cloths that even that was a challenge. Here are a few pictures from it all.













In the end, there were three racks of cloths like the one shown. I took a picture of some of the cast members during Cast Pictures to give you an idea of how they looked.
I had a blast with this project and feel really blessed to be able to do it.
As a side story, My favorite character in the play is Martha, seen in the cast picture wearing a cream blouse and red skirt. She is optimistic and helps in healing the whole story. She is a maid and wears very simple cloths but the whole time that I worked, hand sewing, beading, adding lace, velvet etc., I wished I could have made her something beautiful that would reflect her spirit. But that would be out of place for her part so I sewed costume jewels into the hem of one of her smocks, because she was a treasure. I told the girl who played her after the production was over and she was so delighted. She said she was bummed her part didn't have any fun cloths like some of the other characters, but she sang fabulously and played her part well none the less.
And so it is, I think with our part in life and where we are to affect and help the lives of each other around us.

My Secret fun!

I have always liked to sew; Halloween especially! I'm not saying I'm polished at it, but what fun to create things from scratch. Walking into a fabric store is like looking at paints waiting for a canvas! And now I get a chance to really play (and get payed)!
I am the new Costume Director for the upcoming play "The Secret Garden"! A friend is co-owner of Actors' Youth Theatre. She asked if I wanted the job and I jumped!
So I'm telling you this because until October 20-23, I am taking a hiatus from this blog. I'll be back soon with pictures and thoughts and I'll check in to your blogs when I can. I'll tell you how it went in October.

And the winner is...

The Chocolate Cheese Cake by Chris! We started the awards ceremony with the Star Wars fan fair song playing in the background and gave honorable mention to all the great treats! Then the winner was announced and everyone was surprisingly civil. Frankly, Grant is so relieved that it wasn't Jack! Yes that hunk of a man can cook and boy how! Lucky us, we'll be having that again. The recipe will be coming as promised, sometime between SWAT shooting practice and DUI work. But here are some out takes from our summer fun in the mean time. (the broken plate is courtesy of Jango who has gotten big enough to bring down lots of food now days)

Just to wet your appetite

We wanted to clarify the contest for our loyal fans. No this wasn't eaten all at once (keep up runners)! This was an ongoing contest that we started back in May. With Dad's crazy cop schedule we usually have family home evenings on Tuesdays or whenever we had an undisturbed night (Are we ever really undisturbed?). This was the motivation to have Family Home Evening every week, and except for the week we were camping, (we didn't count the s'mores) we had FHE all summer long. So, yes we ate all that sugar, along with helpful Uncle Sam, a very undeserving dog and other willing family, but not at the same time. Each person planned their treat ahead of time so the ingredients were included in the weekly grocery trip and then they made the creation them selves (or as much as they could). The boasting, scheming, planning, dreaming, and eating went on all summer long and it was a great summer! After careful counting of comments and e-mails, counts and recounts, chads and maybe some bribbery, we finally have the winner. But you'll have to wait till tonight when we present the beautiful trophy seen above at Family Home Evening! (8ish AZ Time)

Summer Desert Dessert Contest!

Please Vote!

This summer, as motivation for Family Home Evenings, we started a simple dessert contest.
(We don't condone the evils of sugar, but you can't judge a 'Best Spiritual Lesson' contest.)
We've tried to keep each dessert anonymous but its hard to leave out the creator on some of these. Please be as unbiased as possible when voting. We understand the difficulties in voting on a dessert without tasting them, so as an added incentive, the winner of this year's contest will post their recipe on this blog. Happy Voting! Here are the summer's entries in no particular order. Please post your ballot in comments or at chrisandjenny@hotmail.com.

Volcano Cake. Chocolate Bunt cake with chocolate peanut butter drizzle. Topped with oreo's , and filled with a milk and Dry Ice explosion.

Hawaiian Shaved Ice. Made with fresh mango's and Pineapple and a tropical punch kick.

Mint Brownies. Rich Chocolate mint brownie with a layer of mint in the middle. (Actual photo was deleted...)

Chocolate Cheese Cake. Layers of Chocolate cake sandwiching a layer of Cheesecake, and fudge icing in between to hold it all together.

Rainbow Cake. White cake with sprinkles, topped with rainbow sorbet. (If you like rainbows and butterflies...) As American as Apple Pie. Apple Pie and Vanilla Bean Ice Cream. (What's better than apple pie?- jars of apple pie filling that you can use any time you want!)Sugar cookies. These cookies are shaped like tools because this builder believe desserts build a strong family. (sound like a primary theme?) Flag Cake. Even more American than Apple Pie and topped with this summer's freshest fruit.

Home Made Ice Cream. Homemade vanilla with M & Ms, Snickers, Chocolate and caramel laced in.
Cereal. A favorite night time treat for a busy day, and perfect to enjoy in front of Discovery's Shark Week.
Good luck and happy voting!

... if you hate them that much, why not drive a plane into their house?

I recently bought a 'new' stove off craigslist, and+ met a very cantankerous man. (Love craigslist by the way!) As we were preparing to load my beautiful stove into my brothers truck, our small talk lead into how he hated 'wetbacks'! I was so offended that he even used that term. Hello! I thought we'd all learned how stupid racism is. I told him about my great hispanic neighbors, trying to put emphasis on hispanic in case his little brain had never heard the proper word. He didn't get it! What an idiot! I wanted to drop the oven then, but we'd already made the deal and had traded cash. I wish I could have been more brave, and refused to deal with such a bigot!
It remined me of a man I met at a bus stop in Brooklyn after 9/11 who went off on Islaims. He was so sure that we shouldn't let imigrants into our wonderful country, and then I mentioned how all of my ancesters came from another country. He proudly told of his ancesters who came from Poland. (Oh, no wonder... Kidding! No more Polish jokes) Wheres the logic if we're all imigrants and yet we should hate the next generation coming in. Argh!
Hate is so stupid! I HATE people who HATE people! wait... i mean...um... Just don't hate people until you get to know them, then it's ok! :)

The happiest poisoning I have ever had

OK, so it's the only poisoning I have ever had and really since I'm not a doctor, I can't even be sure of that. But this had all the symptoms of food poisoning and I had it fierce! You don't want details. I lay on the floor most of the day, because I didn't have the strength to get back in bed and Mackay was happier (read: quieter) if I was close to him. While I laid there I couldn't help but remark to my self that this was one of the best sicknesses I'd ever had.
It's summer so I didn't need to get the kids from the bus stop, I had the means to call my daycare client and call in a sick day, I have a son who can make French Toast for dinner, and I had no obligations what so ever that couldn't wait a day. I didn't have to go down to a well to fetch water, I had a toilet in my very own Master bedroom. I lay on a nice carpet in air conditioning comfort and I had a trustworthy doctor as back-up in case this was more than I could handle. I even had a puppy who came and laid beside me to keep me company. I had a good husband who took the kids swimming for a while so I could sleep and good kids who played on their own (even in the middle of no TV week).
I know, so I'm making you all jealous about how good my life is but really, in between pukes- I knew I had it easy.

Laverne's

I don't know about every woman, but I know a lot of us have beauty secrets, things we do to feel beautiful. One of mine is eye brow waxing, and I try to stay up on that as much as possible, to avoid looking like Bert from Sesame Street. I just feel framed better when I get that done. There is a nail place on Lindsay Road in Mesa, AZ that my sister introduced me to that is inexpensive, and close. And with their strong Vietnamese accents, always fun to go to. Today I noticed a sign in the window that announced they are closed on Sundays. When I asked Laverne about it, she told me that the store was in a Mormon area and that they were very quite on Sundays, so no point. I asked her if she lived in that Mormon neighborhood, No. I asked if she had ever been to those Mormon's church, No. She told me she had been raised Catholic by her Catholic parents who were converted in Vietnam, but that she was a 'lazy' Catholic. I mentioned that now that she didn't work on Sundays she had time to go to church, but our time was up and the conversation ended.
Homework for readers:
If you ever want to get your nails done, or eyebrows waxed (or mustache, I wont tell), go to Laverne's. She does great pedicures I hear and I'm hoping to go there on a date some Saturday with my husband, he's on his feet just as much as I and would really enjoy it! Ask her about church. Who knows were it will go. And any establishment that honors the sabbath should be blessed with business the rest of the week, especially from those Mormons! I'll tell you what I find out in 6 weeks when I go back for my eyebrow waxing.

Fear & Faith on a Friday

What a fiasco! What a treat!
Last Friday while getting gas, I noticed an old woman sitting in a car with an obvious flat tire. With my kids safely in the A/Ced van, I walked over and asked her if she needed any help. She pointed in an obscure direction and said her husband was calling someone. In the opposite direction, an old man stood at a payphone trying to punch numbers for a call. Must be a match! So I gingerly approached him, fearful that I might give him a heart attack if I startled him. He was indeed the 'husband' but wasn't getting anywhere on the phone so I offered my cell phone to him. After he had called for help, he asked if I would take his sick wife home. "...the heat, you know." So I helped his wife into the van, a little surprised he trusted a stranger with his sweetheart. He gave me vague directions and told me "she gets mixed up sometimes..." Okay... While driving home, she asked me "Are you a Mormon girl?" Well I haven't been a 'girl' for many years but I answered her "Yes!" She had guessed as much. She had a good Mormon friend, she said. When I dropped her off at home and helped her inside, I noticed several Air force decorations and asked about them. Her husband, Gene Cavanaugh was a Paratrooper in WWII and dropped into the Battle of the Bulge! So cool! And I got to meet him!
I laugh at my fear of approaching them and wonder at his fear of jumping into Belgium to fight Germans in what became the biggest and bloodiest battle that American forces experienced in World War II. How easy it seems now to trust your wife to a Mormon girl after trusting your life to God and then jumping out of a plane.
I'm still geeking out about the experience. How lucky am I to help someone who fought for my freedom. I think if I'd had my camera on me I would have asked for a picture. Probably better that I don't carry my camera with me!

Quinceanera

My 14 year old Hispanic neighbor and I were talking about her up coming Quinceanera. She told me about some of the traditions. I personally like how she will wear Sandles to the party and then her Dad will exchange them for High Heals. She asked me about our 'sweet sixteen' traditions. Do we have any sweet sixteen traditions? I always thought it was just sweet sixteen because you had never been kissed by a boy and that was a good thing! Then when I turned sweet sixteen, my best friends teased me about it! Wait- I thought it was a good thing! :) I didn't have anything to tell her. So much for good old fashioned American traditions!
Her 15th birthday is in October so I have time to plan this one. Does anyone know what to give a girl on her Quinceanera? Liliana is really wonderful and always translated for me when I can't think of enough 7th grade Spanish. She has babysat in a pinch for me and is just a great girl to have next door. I would love to honor my neighbor's tradition with a thoughtfull (but inexpensive) gift. Any suggestions are much apprciated.
Gracias!

Happy Birthday Lucy!

Happy Birthday to my niece, Lucy! She passed away over a year ago, just two weeks shy of her second birthday. Hailey still asks how long Lucy is going to be asleep and when will Jesus wake her up. Oh, her impatience! How wonderful to have family and cousins and the love to be with them. No one understands like my brother and sister-in-law just how impatient one can feel when waiting for the Lords plan to work it coarse course.
Happy un-birthday to my other niece and all my nephews, who we love even more and try not to take for granted (even though I may forget their birthdays).

Utah Or Bust

If any one knows of anyone going to Utah in the next few weeks, and wouldn't mind two stow-a-ways that would pay for gas, I'd love to talk. My Mom is missing her Grand kids and I am trying to remedy that for her.

Eat, Drink and Be Merry, for tomorrow you fry.

Confession time. All winter I have laughed at you. Yes, all my northern family and friends, I have laughed at your winter misery. The snow shoveling, black ice, and bleak grey days.I have listened to your woes and I have wondered why you would choose to live in a place where the weather could potentially kill you. Here in Arizona on a cold night, Chris and I would get our warmest flannel blanket out and sit on our patio with a cup of hot cocoa. Somedays, if it matched my outfit, I would even don a scarf, just for effect. 0
But judgment day is at hand. Actually it came April 21st, around the time Joe & Jen in Boston were waiting for their pile of snow to melt. The first day of 100 degree weather, the first of MANY!
Oh ye fair ones... ye better tan soon or it will be a long summer of sunburns.
Now is my day of reckoning, where I will drive with hot pads, and put sheets in the freezer so we can get comfortable at night. My cloths line complaints are mute now when cloths hung on the line are done faster than a hot pocket in the microwave. (disclaimer: I don't actually eat hot pockets, hot dogs, hot sauce or anything with the word hot in it until at least November)
I hear the maddening hum of fans, A/C's and computer tower fans like I lived in a self-sustaining, completely enclosed space port. I run from house to car to store and use lame mantras like "at least it's a dry heat". And I am sweaty from now until October, even in the pool. I will wonder why we choose to live in a place that cold potentially kill someone.
And just when I think I have served my sentence, and my day of penitence is at an end, September comes and you all tant us with pictures of crisp colorful autums, complete with a fall wardrobe and new colors to match. You will feel a change in the air and We will still be in the 100's, wearing our line-crisp, sun- bleached shorts and looking at our yellow lawn. We will be preparing for Halloween and planning costumes that won't over heat the kids while they trick-or-treat.
Yes, I laughed at you and now I am sorry. Forgive me and excuse me, I'm going to find an ice cube to put down my back!

Arthur Carl Hope

My grandfather passed away two weeks ago and so my family drove to Utah for his funeral. I love my Grandpa, but I never felt like I really took the time to get to know him. He didn't like little kids and my mom tells me he was a grumpy person. I also have lots of family in Utah including my newest Nephew, Peter. So this was not a singularly sad occasion, I looked forward to family and his eulogy just so I could hear more about his life.
Aurthur Carl Hope served in the Military, served a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter -day saints and was the first in his family to ever go to college. He became a mathematician and worked at White Sands Missile Range in New Mexico. I joked that he worked on the Manhattan Project and that was why he was so reserved and grumpy. He was a great wood carver and has some of his artwork on display in a museum. And his obituary states that he loved dogs. He'd had four that I knew of.
The real measure of my grandfather is his legacy. And my real excitement for this trip was my Aunts and Uncles, and cousins. He had five children and 37 grandchildren. I have an Aunt and Uncle who served a mission in Mongolia, and one set who served in Singapore. I have an Uncle who wrote a book called 'Ground Pounders' (good read!) . My cousins are spread from the East Coast to the West and we don't see each other often, but we all get along and my cousins are fun, interesting, down to Earth and down right hilarious. Half seem to be Engineers- part of Grandpa's Legacy, maybe? We hadn't seen each other together in almost twenty years and still were genuinely happy to be together and feel a connection. After the luncheon, each of us stood up and took turns telling a memory. I heard bits and pieces of my grandpa in the memories we had all collected from him and was able to feel like I knew him better. What a good man, what a great family.
We are the ripples of his life that continue on and get greater and greater as we go.

your Challange

If you are reading this and have not yet been married, skip it and go to the next blog.

When I lived in New York, I meet a great gal named Liz Fuller. During one of our girls night chats, she told me of a challenge to make love with your husband everyday for a month. I wanted to try it, but then the laundry, kids, fatigue, head aches, jerky husband...
Then my husband joined the Police Force and the choice was no longer mine to decide. He worked some nights, slept days and the vicious cycle never ended. Poor pitiful me! Have you ever seen LadyHawk? She's a hawk by day and human at night. He's human by day and a wolf by night. Somehow they never connect. (In the above picture I can imagine him wondering if the hawk would try to scratch his eyes out if he tried to kiss her.) Great love story.
A couple of weeks ago my husband informed me he had training for a week and would be off work around 6 every night that week. Somehow (and that's a big somehow) I remembered Liz's challenge. Could I do it? With now 4 kids, a dog and so much going on, would it even be possible. Would I be up to the challenge? How could I pass it up, I had just been told I got my husband back, for a week at least. So last week while he trained by day, I schemed for the night.
Do you want to hear a secret? It was fabulous! A few 'quickies' mixed in and by the end of the week, I was flexing muscles I didn't know I had- Sex muscles! The amazing part was near the end of the week when I didn't feel quite as stresses about things and he seemed more attentive to my needs! We were connecting again. If you are a fan of sex like I am, you've probably read about all the healthy perks of a healthy sex life. I believe its true and more. It creates a healthy marriage and vies versa.
It was a great week.
(Thanks Liz. Hope you get your husband back too! And Liz, and Joy and all of us wives who have to live with out our husbands at times.)

oh, the potential

I secretly lament my own untapped potential. I have often thought, "If I'd just had more time, I could have done that better." Or " If I had all the money to put into that, I could have really created something amazing with that project." I feel that I want to explain myself when I give a gift or a meal, "This isn't how I envisioned it, if you could see the real me...
... but then I think about my neighbor Alfredo Cruz, and people like him. My neighbor is from Mexico and owned a ranch down there before coming up here (why would he leave that?). He worked on concrete until things slowed down and now I hear he works in a restaurant to make ends meet.
I often drive by men standing out on the street corner waiting for work of any kind. With out the hour long debate of who deserves what, politics, and immigration, I think of these men who just want to work and the lost potential of all those man hours. How would it feel to be able and willing and come home at the end of the day with nothing to show from your life. A good job gives that feeling of purpose and success in life- no doubt about it. I wonder if one of these people could discover cancer if they'd been given the change to even dream about college. What potential do some people live with and never achieve. Will we arrive in the next life with a a basket full of would've, should've, could'ves? (I love the Olympics because of the stories of potential achieved!)
I came across this quote from President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Thomas S.Monson and loved it.
"In the private sanctuary of one's own conscience lies that spirit, that determination to cast off the old person and to measure up to the stature of true potential."
I try to look at people and imagine their potential. I saw a women trying to shift decaying fence boards to repair her fence and wondered what she would be like if she were the Queen of England. Imagine the Queen in 'her go-to-corination crown' fixing a fence!
As for Alfredo, when our 'chicken' turned out to be a rooster and had to be 'disposed of', he came and did the deed and then showed me how to de-feather it. He was so remorseful when his dog bit my son, and is a very watchful parent of his own children. If his potential is nothing more than to be a great neighbor,father, husband, then I'm happy for him.
As for me, I'm not done yet.

Airing dirty laundry

Our dryer is out. And my wonderful, overly busy husband will fix it... Until then, we have been hanging everything out to dry. This is a frugal way to save; cloths last longer, are brighter and the energy expense is smaller without that large appliance.
But I have also noticed everything being washed, and so the Laundry Flow Analysis began! Somewhat more intense than an audit from the IRS, I dissected every family members laundry use. It sounded something like this:
"Boys, I have noticed that you each wear a pair of socks 6 days a week. That would result to 12 pairs, or 24 socks a week, but I haven't washed any of your socks yet. It makes me wonder, where are you spending your socks?"
"Hailey, you have worn 5 outfits before lunch on Tuesday and 3 on Wednesday. You have an outfit spending problem and you need to cut back before you become bankrupt!"
"Mackay, I see room for growth in your laundry. Bigger cloths are much easier to hang out to dry after all."
"Chris, I have washed nine kinds of blacks and navy blues. You need to diversify your laundry and I have set forth a portfolio of ideas I'd like to see you in. Please see the tab labeled button down, cotton shirts."
"Jenny, your biggest laundry problems result in stains from others. You can build a nest egg of cloths as a cushion against messy times-or just wear a smock around your kids."
"Jango, because we can not wash fast enough to keep up with you, you must become house trained immediately."
With these easy ideas, your family will cut down in laundry waste, build your portfolio and come out looking good!
With our eyes open to just how much dirty laundry our family of 7 makes, we are polishing our best clothes and NOT buying anything more for Easter. We have enough of everything and really, will be happy to just have clean, pressed clothes for Sunday. Look for us wearing our "normal best" on Sunday and a little more $ in our savings account.

Side note: I do long for the day when I can step out of the shower and dry off with a soft towel that wasn't standing stiff in the corner.

the little things

I found this little lady in my yard. When I first saw her, I thought she was a button. I'd never seen a lady bug so big and red, she didn't seem real. But she clamored over blades of grass on her way to some garden party for which she was dressed up. I was happy to meet her acquaintance even if it meant that I had been pulling wretched weeds from my yard at the time. She didn't seem to mind the weeds and at the moment, neither did I. My kids still have fun in their private yard so they must agree with the lady bug. Maybe I will forget the weeds and take care of the little ones in my life. Enjoy your garden party Lady, and I'll enjoy mine.

It doesn't add up

While waiting for my sons to finish their Karate class, I shared this treat with my daughter Hailey and son, Mackay. I don't usually look at the nutrition facts on things that I eat, it's a waste of calories but since we had time...
We had bought a snack pack with three cookies in it. Don't you love the clouds on the box, "oh look these float on clouds, they must be light"! It declares the serving size is just one cookie- yeah right!- and gives the information for that one serving. But it also gives the info for three which we all know is what I'd really be eating if I wasn't with my children. The information as follows:
Calories for 1: 120 for 3:370
Fat 1: 50 3:160
Sodium 1: 5% 3: 16%
Fiber 1: 6% 3 17%
Now help me out here my mathematician friends, Marily and Julie, how does 50 g of fat for one change into 160 for 3? Is this why they warn us about high fructose corn syrup? Its increasing exponentially. Wow, I thought I lacked in Math. Or could it be the sodium alginate, tricalcium phosphate or sodium acid pyrophosphate. This is why I don't read labels!
Because of this experience, I now buy several packages of chocolate chips at the store. If I'm going to have a treat, and I am, I'm making it my self. My cookies are as good as veggies when compared to these treats and I have several cookies that taste just as good with whole wheat in them. Any one have a receipe for homemade oreos?

It's a dog's life loving you baby! -Sting; Brand New Day

In High School, an acquaintance's dog died and I had the stupidity to ask why that was such a big deal. "Its just a dog," I callously remarked. That sums up how I felt about dogs. I do not consider myself a dog person so I find myself in an interesting predicament when I announce the newest member of our family: Jango, a 6-week-old Boxer. We have debated and planned for this even for 2 1/2 years but 2 events catapulted us into it's eventuality: 1) my son Grant is turning 8 and has asked for a dog for the past 4 gift giving events (birthdays and Christmas), and 2) my son Jack was bitten recently by a dog.
My reasons against a dog: They shed, they're smelly, they bite and chew (things and sons), they cost $, I'd have one more soul to care for and have to make arrangements for when we're out of town, they pee & poop.. Did I mention their smell? Yep, why put myself through all that?
Reasons for a dog: Jack needed help getting over his fear of some dogs. Some dogs he will always fear and rightly so, but we really want him to have the chance to see the 'supposedly' good side of man's best friend. Our children wanted one and since I'm in the habit of giving my children whatever their little hearts desire (read sarcasm in that last part) it just fits. I believe in a healthy respect for God's creatures and children should learn to care for and have responsibility for something that has consequences of its own when neglected. And when I think about the experiences of my acquaintance with his dog and the learning process of loving, caring and eventually losing his dog, I want my family to share that experience. (This might mean that Jack or Grant will be on their missions when Jango dies).
So here we go, we're a dog family. Can't wait to see what Dogs are all about. So far, one day at a time, we are loving him. This morning after walking to the bus stop, Jango was shivering so I tucked him in with Mackay for the ride home. Both seemed happy and it made a great photo opportunity.
(side note: if all creatures are meant to 'fill the measure of their creation' are we cruel to have Jango fixed without the opportunity to become a Poppa?)

Meet Judy, and then say goodbye.

My local grocery store is closing down. After being a part of the neighborhood for 26 years, the Bashas around the corner is closing its doors because it competitive enough. Bashas is a local store in Arizona, started by a local family 75 years ago. It is a great example of how capitalism really should work and even though there are other branches that are still open, we are sad to see ours close.
Judy has worked there for as long as I have shopped there. She is always cheerful and happy while she does her job. Don't you love people who can do their job, even seemingly mundane jobs, and still be happy. I am always impressed with that attitude about life. I resolve when I go through her line that if she is happy while working, that I can be happy because I get to stay home with my kids. (But I need that reminder often, so what will I do without her?)
Do not despair. Judy and several of her co-workers will be going to another store. Judy informed me that she will be working in Fountain Hills. Its not closer to her home she says, but she loves the city and has always wanted to wrok there. How cool for her. Good-bye Judy and good-bye to our Bashas.
BTW, if your in the neighborhood, I put up a Thank You poster by the door, sign it and tell them how you feel.

He's just not that 'into' you!

OK, so for the last year or so, I've had this great relationship going with this really neat guy! We clicked from the moment we saw each other. It was a very symbiotic relationship. I supported him in his most basic needs and he allowed me to eat well over my daily caloric intake with out consequences. How cool is that! Yes, we were meant for each other, and he is just so darn cute. The late nights together, the way he made me smile, the way I helped him to be such a sharp dresser, oh what a year!
But Mackay is a year old now and it's time to move on and go our ways so to speak. But how do I tell him? How could I let him down gently? I had a plan. I went away for the weekend with Chris and when I came I would ween him. I had "leche cuddle' time planned, an idea I got from my sister Joy, where he could cuddle with me while drinking milk out of a sippy cup.
But when I got back from my weekend away, he didn't even seem to notice anything was missing. He didn't try to nurse at all. All the prep and worry over this transition and he didn't seem to care.
Did I mean nothing to him? Was our relationship nothing to him. As releaved as I was, I felt a bit cast a side. How could he be so heartless and crule. I had given up sleep for him, changed my wardrobe (goodbye dresses) and had adjusted my schedule to be there for him at his beck and call. Maybe this relationship wasn't as symbiotic as I had once thought. Now that I think about it, I did put up with a lot of crap from him. What I really want to do is buy a big box of Krispy Kremes, eat the whole box, and cry watching old movies. But wait, who would burn my calories for me while I walowed? Oh Mackay, Mackay, Mackay!!
At least I have my loving husband who is still there for me, even after having to share our relationship. And I am very confident that he loves me for more than just my body, well mostly confident.

B & B

Chris and I celebrated our 13th year together by going up to flagstaff and skiing for the weekend. We had such a blast that even locking our keys in the car after a day of skiing didn't ruin the day. (Sorry about that honey!) I had brought my MP3 player and listened a bit while we skied. On one run, weaving in and out the song 'Everlasting Love' by Howard Jones played in the back ground. I smiled to think of Chris and I, and how far we've come. We skied for our honeymoon which really means that Chris skied down and then waited for me to come sliding in. I've worked hard to change that and now only slide some of the time. ;)
The highlight of our weekend came after a day of skiing when we checked into our Bed and Breakfast. The Starlight Pines is a Victorian Style home with fireplaces and claw foot tubs in each bathroom. We stayed in the 'dragon fly' room, named for its antique furnishings and dragon flie patterns on everything. Even the Tiffany lamp had dragon flies on it. The owners, Richard and Micheal thought of everything, with campaign flutes and sparkling cider in our room. Breakfast was gourmet 'egg towers' and asparagus. I'd give you the recipe but really, you just need to take a weekend and go try them for yourself. I highly recommend this B&B. If you've never tried one, they're great! (No, I don't work for Flagstaff's tourism board.)
Part of the charm of a B&B are meeting other guest who are also staying there. One such guest was a man named Klaus who is Dutch and lives in St. Martins. We had a fun conversation over breakfast and then had a morning nap before the Woodland ward meeting at 11:00. Its always fun to visit other wards and to know the church and our brothers and sisters are the same everywhere.

A big yellow bus took my girl away. Dont it always seem to go That you dont know what youve got Till its gone... -Joni Mitchell

John Mayer's version of 'Big Yellow Taxi' played in my head this morning as Hailey gave a long backwards wave on the bus to school. It an interesting feeling to watch my kids take off for their day. I am relinquishing control that I really don't have.
I remember when Jack was born, and I was overwhelmed with the ideas of nurturing, educating and enjoying my brand new little boy. I used to read to him from my Botany books while studying because I thought silence was not conducive to his growth. Boy, howdy-did that one backfire on me! :) I always felt it was my job to encourage curiosity, to let them test their boundaries just a little (yep, that one backfired a time or two also) and to fill their every waking moment with life! But that always included my guided tour of life. When they were young, we lived in an apartment with a forest, stream and fireflies behind it. Great exploring but always close to me. I wanted to bring out my microscope and have a little home schooled lesson on what our spiderwebs caught. (Easy when your not dusting!)
But four kids later, I 'm learning that I may be hindering their growth. Maybe!?! The stress of trying to fill their every moment with great experiences along with living my life as well is a bit much. When we had President's day I was determined to work on our landscaping but the kids whinned that they didn't no what to do (and it is a no-tv week so no help there.) I'm realizing that they will have to use their own brains to invent themselves and some of what they will experience. This morning while waiting for that 'Big Yellow Bus' to take my kids away, Jack and Grant fought over first spot in line. I tried to help and inwardly felt frustrated that they were wasting a beautiful morning and a great relationship on a fight! But my mind said "Hey Mom, this is their life and their choices. You can help, but its up to them if they ruin their day or make it a great one."
So maybe I will step back (just a bit) and watch their lives unfold. I am determined to make the 'classroom' a postive place but the learning will be up to them. This actually feels good-must mean it's right! Can't wait to see what they do with their lives!

Let's talk about socks, Baby!

You know the old joke about dryers eating socks? Its not true! Yes, I know-stop the presses!
Do you want to know where your lost socks go? They find their way to my house. So many times, when I sit down to fold my laundry, I'll pull out a sock and have no idea where it came from. Since I'm the only clothes shopper for our family (Except for Chris, but he only shops @ Cops-R-Us!) I recognize all the socks and just how long ago I'd bought the batch. I can date them because of how many holes have been stitches up in them.
So when I find a new one, I have to think back to who was at my house in the last couple of days. Babysat kids? Neighbors? Maybe it was one of the boy's friends. Some look to big to be my boy's sock but to small to be Chris'.
Just the other day I found a pair of chocolate brown socks that fit Mackay's tiny toes. Since it matches his Sunday corduroy pants I'll claim them, but I can't help but think someone will recognize them from their missing laundry. Joy, are they your sons?
I'm sorry anyone out there who keeps missing socks, if I could I would return them to you but since I have them, I will just wish that socks got lost in pairs.

lol! c u 2!

The art of conversation is slipping from me. I think it's because I'm a Mom and married to a cop. I don't have meaningful adult conversation at the end of each day, or pillow talk to keep my communication skills fresh. I've even heard my self say things like, "we're going on the store" instead of "to the store". Where did that come from? I'm getting the basics wrong! Ugh! How could I be losing what I have learned so soon in life?
It doesn't help that Chris and I only have so many moments to talk from when he wakes up and is off to work, or he's home but I'm off on errands with kids. It sometimes feels like the end of a car commercial... "2.99%financingandGrantneedsnewgipants,Haileyimprovedonhertest,Jack needstotalktoyouaboutabully,butyouneedtobringitupwithhim, whatdoyouwantmetodowiththepropanetankandwehaveababysitterforthursdaynight
ifyourpagerdoesn'tgoeofffirst! Say that really fast! Yup that's it!
I am always trying to rack my brain to tell him things from most important to least important and not leave anything out that would otherwise just come out during the course of a conversation. That way when we get interupted at least the most important things are discussed. It kills me when I've told him something twice, like I've used up a life-line in a game show and only have so much time left. Will I win the million or run out of time.
Maybe I should learn police code so I can just tell him there's a 918 101 at home you need to talk to, what's your eta (estimated time of arrival). Or better yet, I could use texting language and lol with my bff.
None of this is helping my communication skills. (Not to mention, I'm so slow at texting).It ends up making my conversation choppy and hurried. Where's an English immersion course when you need one? Do you think they would let me in?

Mothers & Brothers

A sad part of being a Police Officer's wife, is attending the funerals of other officers. To watch another family go through what you pray doesn't happen to your family is difficult for anyone, but a police officer's death makes it a little too close. A few months ago we attended Shane Figueroa's funeral and I watched his young widow with their 3 month old daughter. She was surrounded by close family, friends, and hundreds of uniformed Police Officers who may not have known him personally but came because he is considered a brother to them, one of their own. The funeral was attended by the Governor, Phoenix Mayor, and Sherriff Joe.
It got me thinking about 'brothers' in law. They really support each other because they know how difficult their jobs are. Most are especially courteous to families of officers as well which is how I got out of a well deserved ticket once. They morn the loss of an officer and some, like my husband, remember those who pass in some way. Chris usually arrests a Drunk Driver that night.
But what about Mothers. We all know how hard our job is and how much we could use that extra support and courtesy. Imagine if all women Funerals for mothers are attended by families, and mothers are missed at what ever age they leave us, but we don't really view it as 'losing one of our own' do we. It's not attended by every mother in the area. Even when my Brother and Sister-in-law lost their only child, I did not consider the tragedy as 'losing a Mother'. Her potential for mothering is still there and her love for the next child and all children she serves is just as strong.
Do you remember Andrea Yates? A mother who drowned her five children. That's where I consider the tragedy as losing one of my own. A woman, who lost her love and ability to mother. The whole event is a tragedy and I do not mean to make light of her troubled life. She had mental problems, which her husband new about, and had arranged to have his Mom come help her out later that morning. But a part of the Police officer's words who arrived at the scene stuck out to me. He said when they arrived after the 911 call they found her "in a frumpy stripped shirt and stringy hair". It made me think of some of those days when I didn't think anyone cared how I looked and I ended up wearing a frumpy shirt the whole day. It's days like that when I am not as pleasant to be around and am not the Mom I want to be. How I feel about me reflects on how I treat my kids. When I am wearing a fun out fit I feel fun for my kids, when I look nice, I act nice and try to smile and give my family a pleasant person to look at. Trivial but true. So as I mulled over Officer Figueroa's funeral and 'brothers' and my work as a mother, I have decided to morn for Andrea Yates and mothers like her who didn't get the help they needed in time, who didn't have a support group to tell her days are hard, please just hang in there, it gets better.
So I am picking my frumpiest shirt (My husband will be so thrilled) and I am burning it. Not the college shirt I like to run in, or my painting and yard work shirt. The one that almost looked nice once and that I still put on when I'm going to mop and then keep on because I'd just get spit-up on me next and why have to wash another shirt any way! No, it must go! If I could see you, any of my fellow Mothers, and you are wearing your frumpy shirt, I would love to take you out for lunch, make sure you are ok, and then convince you to burn your shirt. Mothers Unite! After all, we mothers need to stick together!