Running, on

I'm a runner as much as making my family dinner each night makes me a chef. But I am enjoying my early morning runs. The sound of my feet, the rhythm the body just naturally falls into, the quiet except for small conversations between running partners, it's all great. And because it's so much fun I'm on a Ragnar team! We're running the Ragnar Del Sol in Arizona in Feb. 200 miles between 12 people. My Husband and I are running it together! Can't wait to have fun, and see how race day adrenaline will affect my pace. I ran 8 miles on Saturday and feel great about it. I"ll post pictures although I hear pictures really can't convey what this kind of event is really like.

Give away!

My talented sister-in-law has a fun, crazy, honest blog about her life, her family (my brother and nephew) and her feelings after losing her 2yr old daughter, my niece Lucy. Check it out here:

http://jacksonparkcity.blogspot.com/
And while you are doing that, you can enter her give away for lots of cool stuff, which I am hoping to win! Happy Blog staulking!

a hot cocoa in time

July 13th or around that date (literally) Hailey spilled her hot cocoa on our desk calendar.
Why was she drinking hot cocoa in the summer in Arizona, you ask? She took swim team this summer at 9am but thought the pool was too cold. As a motivator I would make her hot cocoa to take in a insulated cup to warm her insides while she swam in the cold water. It only took a month for the water to warm up.
Back to the spill...
As soon as it spilled, we mopped up what we could but it spread into the crease and to the months ahead. It's been an ugly blot on the calendar and I have looked forward to the month when I would turn the page and it would be a clean fresh month. It happened November 1st and now I miss the darn spot. It went much quicker than I expected and makes me nervous for how fast things are moving.
Mackay asks over and over again if he is "this many" yet, holding up his four fingers. No Mackay, you are still three. "Aw Man!" he exclaims dishearteningly. Will four ever come?-he thinks. Will November ever come?-I thought. Can I slow things down? I wonder now.
I have decided to get a Sonic gift card with my next years calendar and tape it to some random day that seems so far off. Then when it comes, I will reward my self for getting there! Endure to April 7th!

therapy

(Poor kid's neck is so large I don't dare snap the top snap on his outfit!)


Our foster son has physical therapy once a week. Because he was drug exposed his body was really stiff and so milestones that come naturally to most babies are slow for him. Our loving therapist Jill started just by moving his arms. Soon he was reaching out for the toys around him. Then she rolled him back and forth so his body could feel what rolling should feel like. Each time she puts toys around him, above him, in front of him and then makes the lights and sounds flash to encourage him to reach out. Sitting, tummy time, standing are all part of the 'work' he does each week. She runs a tight ship! At times he tolerates all the moving and working, but towards the end he is just down right cranky.

"To much movement, to much stretching! I want to be left alone." He seems to say.

And I reflect on how something so easy for so many is so challenging for him. I saw a program on therapy for returning vets, especially those with head trauma. They had to relearn to do such simple things like eat, tie their shoes and eventually grocery shop (OK that last one can be tricky, but you get the idea). Men and woman who once commanded soldiers into battle now start over again in humble baby steps. I also think about my Brother and Sister-In-Law who are relearning to enjoy life after their daughter died, and another family member who is learning to trust God and try His plan for them.
Keep working guys! Rolling over may be hard but the toys are worth it.

yeah!

Do you remember the feeling you got when you got your drivers license? I remember a little fluttering feeling deep down, an excitement with the knowledge that I could go ANYWHERE and do ANYTHING. Well, almost. But it was so exhilarating and free. The whole world was open to me.
Fast forward 20 years
My oldest son turned 12 this month and is a very capable babysitter. He loves the responsibility and is very diplomatic with his siblings when he's in charge. The other night, on what should have been my husband and my date night,my husband got called in to the Police Station for some PR work with the Town Council. He called me to join him. Since half the children were in bed asleep and my very capable 12 yr old was more than willing to stay up and babysit, I went.
Maybe it was because of the early 90's tune playing on the radio or the fact that I was in the car by myself. But I suddenly had that little fluttering feeling again. I had the freedom to go anywhere and do anything, almost. I was so excited with the possibilities opening up to me, I could hardly contain myself! So, there is light at the end of that long, noisy, sometimes very messy tunnel, and I'm here to tell you... it's exciting to see again.

Adam

You've waited toooo long to meet this cute little guy! Adam is now 5 months old and has been in our hearts for 3 months now. He has a great smile, but usually just has this eyes wide open look, like "who are you?" (Why do kids always look at us that way? Are we really that crazy looking?)
He has a therapist who comes once a week to help him work through stiff muscle tone and help him to catch up developmentally. He may have a long journey ahead of him, but for as long as we have him, we're working together to enjoy him and help him enjoy life!

Good bye Anaune!

We said good bye to Anaune on Friday. He went to a new foster home that was supposed to have room for he and his sister. And then his sister's foster home had an opening and now he'll go with her. Good, bad, glad and sad. This was a hard placement for us and a difficult experience as we saw the full dis-functionality of the Foster Care system. He is such a cool kid, with a fun personality. Where ever he actually is, we hope the best for him. I wish we could have kept him, but it wouldn't have worked out with Mackay so well. Mackay had a hard time sharing his room, cloths, toys and mom. I feel like I am slowly learning the system and I ask my self,"Do I really want to know all this, see all this and feel all that goes with it?"
The thought that came to my mind was this. Do not let the heartache distract you from what you set out to do.
And so we have a new child with us. Pictures will come soon, once I get used to night feedings again!